Sold My Soul To The Angel

Im smizin here y'all...

Greetings lovelies..

So i have a good news in stored for ya fab readers...

Im heading to college dolls!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

First of all i have Allah to thank for,somehow he'd listened to my long,weepy prayers

and im extremely appreciative of what he had blessed me with and am beyond speechless..

My mom gave me a call around 10 and she said that i got accepted at PTPL College in Shah Alam...

I didnt expect that out of her...

Completely caught off guard cuz it was so surreal like i've been literally takin rejections in the face(merely a rhetoric statement)

So when my mother called me up and tell me i have been accepted at PTPL College,i was in a mixed  feelings..

I didnt buy it at first cuz i was afraid it'd be just a dream and the next thing i know i literally wake up on the floor but this was nothin like that at all and the enthusiasm and joy completely overwhelmed me after..

I finally grasped of what was really happening and i guess im a college dude now..

But the sad part is im gonna have to leave Jakarta for good and it really is heartbreakin cuz Jakarta is like ingrained in me,i've been stayin here for the past 4 months,gettin out and in was somethin im used to and now im gettin out for good..

Hurmph......................................

Its not like im not gonna see the city again,i'll be comin back around August..

Since my sister's still here and wont be back till Feb's next year which means there's still a chance for me to 'indulge' this city..

I promised myself that i'll try my hardest to be the best among the best and graduate with honors...

That has become my 2011 resolution and will remain the same the in the followin year..

I wish y'all pray for the best for me and wish me well in everythin that i do and likewise to all of ya..

Much love and hugs<3

An Autodidact Of An Adieu

This is by far an outstanding live performance by Beyonce..

She always delivers stellar performance and everything seems to end with greatness  when Beyonce's on stage 
She is such an empowering woman 

Love her to death!!!

Ladies Run My World...

Have y'all seen Beyonce's newest music video?

The one entitled 'Run The World(Girls)'??

If ya havent well ur in for a treat...

Ya can see the vid here on my page..

It was basically off the chain and fantastical!!

Beyonce will always be one of the fiercest divas to ever walks the Earth...

One bodacious,talented,all time diva indeed!!

My Number 4 Stormbreaker

               ALEX PETTYFER BY MARIO TESTINO FOR VMAN 22 from V Magazine on Vimeo.

I swear if i see him walk pass me im gonna go bonkers!!

I love his blonde,clean-cut hair and FYI i werent really into him during his first big break movie role which was The Stormbreaker but after I've seen him on I Am Number Four,i was completely hooked on him..

And now i have this rad idea of dying my hair icy blonde as alex's hair is..

Probably just highlights...

We shall await and see and i guarantee my mom will have a hard time acceptin me in that new,established look.. 

I Handed My Jar Of Hearts Over To Ya...

Peace be upon ya my dear followers and to all of us who are capable of inhaling oxygen and enjoy the perks of life that has been given by Allah...
I just have to bring this up cuz i can no longer keep it to myself and pretend like nothin's goin through my head...


Im really terrified and scared and nervous!!!
I nearly shit in my pants by just typin it up..not really though,i was goin for more a rhetorical vibe but that came out pretty bad didn't it?
Of course y'all are curious to find out what could possibly be causing me such terror...
Well i fear that i wont get the chance to pursue my studies at a college/university...
I just couldnt settle on the thoughts of even not be able to pursue my studies into a higher and distinguished level
Like fingers crossed that will never happen to me or i promise y'all im just gonna lose it...
Lose my insanity,my mind, my everythin...


If any of ya could be thinkin that i made this whole shenanigans up on purpose just to get a free sympathy votes(which i think is utter ludicrous since its not even a reality tv show,its just a rants)y'all are nothin but wrong and i dont appreciate those overwhelming thoughts...


If only i could just talk to the person in charge and just give me the all system go sign it'd be less a problem..
And i know its simple to say for some of ya like 'it aint the end of the world bob!'(forgive me for my lousy country accent),'get back on the horse if ya fall'(if that happens to me i'd end up at a hospital with both of my legs cement) and stuff but it means the whole universe to me cuz at where im currently standin education trumps everythin else that crosses my paths and i need to endeavor that anyhow possible..


Also by endeavor that i manage to do many rad things like help my family out and the utmost paramount thing is to help myself...
By that i am referring to my rebelling,anxiety need to splurge cuz im literally in poverty...


Not that im sayin i dont have roof over my head but to me i guess it aint enough,and i know i should be grateful because there are plenty of other people who are in a much worst adversity than myself but honestly it doesnt gratify me that much..


I just wanna buy my own items with my very owned,well earned money with no guilt and basically be free to have all the money spended...
I wanna buy a house so that my family and friends are able to come to,a car to go where the hell my heart desires,clothes,accessories,ya name it...


I just have all this big dreams but there seem to be no progress...
Im afraid that it will only be a dream that never takes off and someday it'd fades away and leave me with nothin but ashes from all those dreams..


I think from what i've experienced  so far i've had enough of 'bullies' talked down on me,dictates me and made my life as miserable as its not..
Anyways i just gotta earn a diploma and a degree(hopefully Master and PHD next to follow)and get a job at our Malaysian Embassy and be posted to a country i myself have never been to which is pretty electrifying...

Isnt She Lovely...?Isnt She Wonderful...?

'Isnt she lovely...?Isnt she wonderful'

That's what i mostly think of her whenever she flies by into my mind...

Probably y'all are wonderin who's the girl im referring to based on my deeply thoughtful words on the entry title

That..!has to be remain anonymous...

Wouldnt wanna be a shameless douche for sayin her name on not an appropriate portal(also for being profoundly enamored with somebody's gf)

So i met this girl at The Singing Shop(its a voice singing school) and the first time i met her i dont know somethin about her just drove my attention to her..

I remember her(before she decided to wear 'tudung')with her hair pulled back,she had a long sleeve black shirt on with a pair of jeans..And her entrance did catch my attention...

So i was sayin to myself 'who is this girl?'

Cuz trust me i have seen plenty of girls and there was none excitement nor curiosity that kicked in when they passed by and i aint floozy just so y'all know,but with her its totally an unexpected  feeling and different..

My heart was racing everytime i got the chance to see her,also we shared the same vocal teacher ironically...

I'd really wanted to approach and say somethin to her but i couldn't,its as if i froze when she's around...

In other words,i wasnt a gutsy,fearless kinda dude,i was so intimidated by her presence and how perfect i perceived her at the beginning so guess what i did???

I let it passed and that was one of my idiotic decision i've ever done...

I thought it would be over but boy was i wrong,I had a hard time of eliminating her from my mind cuz i have a hefty crush(for a guy who aint floozy that was pretty major)on her...

My heart just rebel and literally throbbing expressin that i should let her know about 

my feelings for her but i was a pathetic,coward ,distinctive guy...

Who in the right mind would want me as their beau??

So i strongly stood my ground and restrain from telling and i found out from her that she had a crush on me as well during the first time we met and prior for one whole week crushing on me...

What a complete prick i am

Let me share with ya guys somethin that i kept under the wraps, I was in teared when she told me that due to my regretful and deplorable agony for not lettin her know...

But in my opinion lovin oneself is to be selfless instead of the opposite..

I looked at her picture(at that time myspace was a prominent portal before facebook)and said she'll be better off with another guy who's just as great as her..

I think she'll be happy without me being in the picture cuz lets face the reality im nobody yet...

And she's a very sweet,kind hearted,intriguing kinda gal and she deserved more than me as birthday gift...

 So today i was browsing the internet as usual and i decided to check my blog out  and i saw her latest blog entry and i took the liberty of checking it out..

She posted a poetry of this particular boy whom i cant help but wonder who it might be...

And she's always been a skillful and darn talented poet...

I dont wanna be self-absorbed and presuming that she's mentioning me in that poetry of her..

But it doesn't matter cuz even if its not me she'll always be my baby and i'll heart her for the rest of my life..<3

She doesnt need to know that cuz its gonna jeopardizes my friendship with her as well as her personal relationship and i dont want to hurt nor offend her...

And i know this sounds sorta cocky and conceited but i dont think i'll ever heart other

 girl as much as i heart her..

I wish her all the success there is in the world,longevity and the utmost paramount thing happiness...

I heart ya MI CORAZON....

Not Another Word From You!

Its Mother's Day yesterday and i am faraway from home and parents to wish my 

momma on mother's day but not to worry i already wished her via Facebook i mean

thats what facebook is for isnt it?


the existence is to tend to our inconvenience and also to make our life a hundred times easier...

Let me tell y'all a little somethin about my mother PN HABSAH 

She happens to possesses magics on her hands while makin and preparin food for us..


she's an uber excellent counselor whom listen to your complaints and hassles all day long if asks and she's ultimately a mother that every boys and girls would ever dream of and dying to have...

So i do consider myself not out of luck for havin her in my life,aside from all those past squabbles and debates,she is a fab mother<3

So im curious to find out if y'all have a friend who you've been really kind to and lets just say she didnt get as much of good grades in her SPM compared to what ya get in urs,


and one day ya gave her a call and inquired whether or not she made it the cut to further her studies into a university/college level and all of a sudden her answer was really an unexpected one and was really gettin on your last nerve?


How would ya react to that?

Cuz that happened to me last night whilst i was dialing her number in an abundant of curiosity and joy when little did i know i was goin to get myself irked and offended by a person that i expected the least to be sayin such thing...

I just have to let this off my chest cuz if i hadn't the annoyance and mad level would rise up and stacked up in piles till i blow in this particular person's face up and she might not know what hit her ,


so god forbids that takes place...

But come to think of it i so dont care what will happen to her!

I've had enough of friends mistreating me and didnt fully fathom the way Haiccal rolls and who really couldnt see me beyond this assertive,loud and blunt established imagery...

Pretty much i wish her all the success there is in the world but if she has a rough patch in beginning her journey at her new study place dont count on me to be her confidant cuz i am so booked on that soon-to-come particular day..


Plus she deserves whatever's hittin her

Karma's a bitch isnt it dolls ;) 

In Pursuit Of Happiness

Salutation dolls to my welcomed and beautiful readers...

(Nonetheless,if ya are my loyal,usual readers or the new ones)

How has your week been?Mine was pretty well up until today somethin unpleasant occurred to yours truly...

But before we get to that i just want y'all to find comfort and pleasure in my up-to-date,latest and newest layout blog that i just changed few minutes ago...

Took me nearly half an hour to revamped and somehow my ass is taped to the chair that im sittin on now for being in this position for too long...

Im sure y'all are wonderin 'why is this dude so eager to have his new layout blog revamped on the double?He can just wait for some other time to do so?'

Well not for this guy here!

I have this control issues otherwise infamously known in its common,familiar,run off the mill term 'control freak'

That said i am not just gonna sit still and not do anythin about it

So,that pretty much explains the obsession and impulsive act of immediate changes...

Capische?!!!.. 

Ok lets get back to where we left off earlier on...

As y'all know today was the day of the 'UPU' feedback application for all of us who are SPM graduates and for who applied it few months back..

Its basically a portal for us former SPM-ers to locate the correct and qualified university for yourself according to your SPM qualifications and credentials...

I did fill every single requirements and conditions and terms up but because of my unlikely excellent result which i find bias and unjust due to my single math subject failure,therefore i didnt make the cut...

The first second i saw the rejection words that was written below my name i went completely into a dejected and upset mode...

I am sad and forlorn but i am not goin to remain nor maintain be upset by it forever...

There are still many other ways for me to reach and claim my success

So givin up is absolutely out of the question...

A shout out to most of my acquaintances who made it and got chosen to further their studies into a higher level...

Dont worry i will soon join y'all

Dont Blame Us For Being Beautiful

Hey dolls we meet again in this new beautiful chapter of my inspired and aspired writings 

Im already back in Jakarta and i must say im thrilled to be back here...

So during my stay back in KL what went down was that i had a fun and pleasant rendezvous and catchin 
up time with my 2 oldest girlfriends aishah and elyn(amalina)...

thats what people call her nowadays :P

My dad dropped me off at Elyn's house and we were on foot heading towards this latest Kelana Jaya's attraction venues named Kelana Jaya Mall..

We got there and made our way to Old Town White Coffee to hang..

We ordered some hors d'oeuvres as what i called and simply had a terrific time...

We chatted and gossiped about some of our old, childhood friends and laughed really hard...

Furthermore i cam whored along with em somethin that i never would've thought of doing in a million years and be likely associated to but yeah i really did it...

Later we were joined by Elyn's beau Johan or Joe,not much of a gregarious person probably due to the fact that i barely know him and vice versa so there was a tad conversation took place between the 2 of us,well actually there was none to be exact..

After we're done with our lunch Johan gave us a ride in his 'pickup truck'(cuz to me it looked like one)

back to Elyn's home..

Arrived there and continued chattin while waitin for my folks to pick me up...

and basically had a fabulous time of our lives...

I know this sounds kinda cheesy but its the truth so i'd like to make a remarks to ya both and thanked y'all for spendin the day with moi,elyn and aishah i love y'all..